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Tuesday, 3 January 2017

Goodbye 2016, Hello 2017


Yes, I do realise that I am 3 days late and I didn't even blog to conclude my 2016.. But this will be the post for that. I think. Most probably. Yep. 

Thought long and hard about the most significant events in my life that have happened this past year, but I couldn't come up with much. I ended my diploma (even got President listed, one of the top 192 students out of 15,000), started my second year of degree, had to face the biggest heartbreak of my life when Dino suddenly disappeared, and that's it. But overall I did have a good year, full of little happy moments that collectively made 2016 an amazing year for me. However I am disappointed in myself for not being able to even cross out at least half of my resolutions. Out of the 13/ 14 resolutions on my life, the only one that I actually managed to accomplish is 'drink more water' hahaha. Gosh, why am I like this. 


Things I wish I'd known in 2016


1. To forgive and forget

I guess one of the things I absolutely dislike about myself is my inability to completely forgive and forget. I can forgive, but geez I could never forget and because of that, I keep all these grudges way deep down inside me. I just archive it instead of wiping it out, and it's readily available for me to bring up or ungkit whenever I'm sad or angry. That's so, so toxic. And it especially applies to relationships, because this can ruin it. Irfan teaches me a lot in this aspect, and I really should learn to be more like him. I can list down all his mistakes from every angle, and he can't list any of mine for the life of him. He forgets my mistakes because when he forgives, he really does forgive me for everything and trusts me enough to learn from it (but y'know sometimes I just don't because I'm terrible.. but again, he would never bring it up like I would). So because of that, a lot of our fights / arguments revolved around this. And if I had learned to forgive and forget, learned from mistakes sooner (and for good), sooo many silly and frustrating arguments could have been prevented. 


2. Not everything is meant to stay with you forever, and Allah can take anything away from you at anytime

Dino's disappearance was meant to teach me a lesson. It doesn't make sense to me still of why it had to happen, but I'm certain that it was in written in my path to teach me an important lesson in 2016. Losing a loved one. I am grateful that I have never had to experience loss of a close relative, or friends, and I pray everyday that Allah will continue to panjangkan their umur.  So losing Dino, even though he's not a person, really felt like a huge loss to me. I was extremely close and fond of him, that I always saw him as the cat that would be with me even after I've gotten married and moved out of my home years from now. I know people who have had their cats for over 10 years, and Dino was only four when he disappeared. I cried about him a lot, and even to this day I still miss him terribly. But this is a life lesson that I will have to learn sooner or later in life. Anything can be taken away from you when you least expect it. Never take things or people or pets for granted, always treat others as if it's the last time you're going to see them, and always remember to live life knowing that your own death can come at anytime too. It's a hard pill to swallow, but it's the realistic truth. 


3. Speak your mind, but not if it will hurt others 

Over the years, I am glad that I have learned to speak my mind and express my satisfaction / dissatisfaction to others. But I guess I got too comfortable with that, that I can become painfully blunt. And it's especially worse to people I love because I had this f-ed up mentality where I thought I couldn't hurt them by what I say because we love and are accustomed to each other (when in reality, it should hurt them more because of that said love). To me, I think I'm just doing them a favour when I say these things and get it straight out of my system but in actuality, there are other ways to talk about it without making someone feel sad or hurt. I found myself always regretting what I say after I've already said it, and it really sucks and I end up feeling like the shittiest person alive. Of course, I'd say sorry afterwards but it would have been better if I didn't have to say sorry at all. 


Best of 2016 





Resolutions for 2017

Besides the on-going efforts to always try and be a better person as a whole, some of the things I'd hope to change and/or do are : 


1. Eat healthier

Attempt to at least eat more vege. If you know me, you'd know that I'm a no-sayur kind of girl. I know this will take a toll on my health in the future so yeah.. gotta start somewhere haha.


2. Learn how to cook. Like, really cook
#RoadToBeingWifeMaterial

Hard to admit but my younger brother is a better cook than I am and it's borderline embarrassing haha. My ultimate goal would be to learn how to cook lauk like curry, or ayam masak merah, butter chicken, dishes like that. But I think I'll start with simpler things like pasta or really good fried rice. And oooh, I really want to do more baking / desserts. 


3. Blog more + take more photos

I hate that I didn't blog as frequently in 2016. I have my studies to blame for, but I could have tried harder to make more time to update this space. I also want to take more and more photos. My camera lens was broken most of the year and I only recently got it fixed. Expect more picture spams in the near future haha. 


4. Read more books 

I was such a bookworm when I was younger. And then came the internet. Sigh. I have books on my shelves that I haven't even read yet, and I keep buying new ones whenever I go to Kinokuniya. Such a shame that I don't make time to read anymore. Books were my everything at one point of my life haha. 

There are other things I hope to accomplish like travel more, or not procrastinating.. but those are pretty common and boring so they don't make it in this list haha. 



Although so many sad and terrible events have happened around the globe, I am incredibly grateful that Allah has kept every person that I hold close and dear to my heart, safe from harm. I pray and hope for the world to become a better + more peaceful place in 2017. Anyway, virtual hugs to everyone who has made my 2016 a good year. Including you guys who read my blog ! I've had multiple opportunities and collaborations this year and it's all thanks to the support you guys have given me. My family (cats included) and best friends, I'm always grateful for and that goes without saying. And of course, Irfan - every time I think he's reached a maximum point of making me feel happy and loved, he surprises me with more ways to make me feel beyond that. 


I had the best end to 2016 and an even better start to 2017. Plus, my cousin Kak Sue just got married yesterday (will blog about it after we get the official photographer pictures), look for the hashtag #nazimsue on Instagram if you wanna see bits of the wedding ! Now that all the wedding shenanigans are over, I need to get back to studying for finals haha. 

Hope the first few days of January have been kind to all of you.


May 2017 be our best year yet. Amin !

 

14 comments:

  1. Can't wait what 2017 has in store for you! Super excited to read your upcoming posts :D xx

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    1. Hahaha aww your excited is making me excited ! Have a good year ahead, sweets ! xx

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  2. Hey Izza, just wanna ask, is there a deanlist for short semester? I mean i know if long semester ada dean list, but if short semester you scored all A's, ada dean list tak? And you apply internship kat mana as you a are a business student?

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    1. Hiii ! Nope, only for long semesters. My diploma course surprisingly tak ada internship, but for my degree later on I have a 6-month internship period. Not sure where / which company I nak intern for yet haha

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  3. Izza your cats are all so uniqely pretty!! Did you buy them from any cat place or or.. Haha

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    1. Thank you !! Haha oh noo none of my cats were bought, my two cats Butter and Sapphire were given to me by my best friend Hanis a few years ago.. then Butter and Sapphire made babies and I got another 5 kittens after that haha. One big happy cat family but now I'm only left with three :/

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  4. Oh and another thing, do you get any scholarships for degree since u always get dean list and presidents list

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    1. No T.T Wanted to apply for a few scholarships but all of them required me to be active in clubs / societies, which I was not. So confirm I wouldn't get a scholarship even if I tried.

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  5. Izzaaaaa, I love your writings. It makes me wanna write too and recently I even made my own blog!! Keep on writing and inspiring people ��✨

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    1. Hii ! Aw thank you so much, and glad you started writing ! You're so sweet, have a nice day xx

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  6. Active in clubs/societies as in college clubs and societies?

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  7. Replies
    1. Happy new year to you too Hari ! :)

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